Lady of the Land @Lady@cat.family

wish the announcers would just put some stakes in the ground regarding the fifth tiebreaker instead of keeping us all in suspense lol

according to wookiepedia laser beams were first introduced to canon in episode 11 of andor

i know how they got here (somebody ages ago synned botw2 with botw and they've refused to revisit that merger and so are just renaming the tag for clarity instead) but it's fucking wrong

literally every other zelda game gets its own tag

OoT/MM? separate tags
OoA/OoS? separate tags
ALttP/ALBW? separate tags
WW/PH/ST? separate fucking tags

oh my god no https://archiveofourown.org/tags/The%20Legend%20of%20Zelda:%20Breath%20of%20the%20Wild*s*Tears%20Of%20The%20Kingdom

me: *playing Twilight Princess*

@Satsuma: [inane question]

me: why are you asking me? i don’t know

@Satsuma: well you are the expert

me: god DAMN it

there was another blowjob but i’m sticking with a rating of 1/10 because this author had them doing 69 and i’m extremely not sold on the logistics of it

« The Sheikah have been wise to retain many records since the destruction of the Kingdom, and one bylaw is clear: A Princess Cannot Rule the Kingdom of Hyrule. » not sure how this author thinks laws work

zelda just asked for everyone to start paying her taxes instead of investing in their local communities and everyone is surprisingly fine with it

« Since the value of rupees has not changed in the last century » wow

also it's like a fundamental misunderstanding of what romance is about but whatever

they're trying reaaallllyyyy hard to be romantic but none of it lands because all i can think about is how they're wrong about zelda

zelda sees faith as obligation i think saying “you are destined for greatness and i believe in you” would be the opposite of help

« "Because you're destined for greatness. It's been written since the beginning of time that you were meant for this. If you don't find the way now, I know you will soon. I have faith in you."

If it weren't for his strong hands holding her steady, Zelda would have collapsed with sobs in the snow. No one had ever had such faith and resolute belief in her. » well this is the exact opposite of how i would have written this

zelda is really unflinchingly pitying of link in this one which i would consider a red flag but i think the author thinks is romantic

so far zelda has gotten off but they keep getting interrupted before link ever does, which is a kink, i guess

in fairness this is tagged

the journey continues we’re only half through this one folks

ah, this is a “Link never sleeps” fic not a “Link always sleeps” fic

1/10 interrupted blowjob in chapter 2; will there be another??

« She may be the Queen, but there was absolutely nothing wrong with taking care of Link and submitting to him. »