Lady of the Land @Lady@cat.family

the javascript is horrid

i made this with javascript

listening to BERWYN

look at these fucks there’s no way they grew that pumpkin themselves

🥴

there are two types of people: those who know the exact cadence at which this is said on a visceral, emotional level, and non-Catholics

Bless us, O Lord, and these Thy gifts, which we are about to receive from Thy bounty, through Christ our Lord, because we are ignorant white settler fucks who don’t know how to grow our own food. Amen.

you can write fairy tales without fairies in them it just makes you a tool

the reason why tolkien is considered the basis for all fantasy is because people infantilized the term “fairy tales”

Vah Naboris’s back is not broken, never has been broken, and considering it is not a beast of labour, would not be seen carrying straw

« The straw that broke Vah Naboris’s back » cute but you do realize this metaphor makes no sense right

🧟‍♀️💤

still upset that that fanfic referred to the Master Sword as a purple sword

no, THIS is a purple sword

yeah i still don’t have an answer for this one

now it’s time to read

THE REVIEWS

― V nice smut but also absolutely hilarious, a lil heartbreaking, and so well written. Second fic ever to nearly make me cry, but happy ending!! [rinaslily]

― Perfection do exist [Narvi_MARS]

― The only link/cargo pants fic I've found so far [Notarization]

― Mother of Smut this is good [Obsidiangst]

okay i have now finished the epic and critically‐acclaimed fanfiction ‘The Calamity of Link’s Cargo Shorts’

the ending was a lot of talking and me being frustrated about decisions regarding canon that nobody who follows me will understand, but trust me that it was very boring

goddammit we’re doing the “my sword remembers your past lives” trope in this one i guess

« At her shout, one of the horses outside makes a loud, disgruntled noise that cuts through the thin fabric of the tent. It's a noise of unambiguous disapproval. ❲…❳

“Sorry, I think Epona wants us to keep the noise down so they can sleep,” Link snickers, raising his eyebrows. “I guess you could say we’re… disturbing the *neigh*-bors.”

What. In. The. Holy. Hell »

« She was torn between the fact that Link is so restrained and silent in normal life and the fact that he’s by no means quiet when fighting or doing anything physical. And after Urbosa made a rather ribald comment about Link’s excessively loud grunts during a training session, Zelda couldn’t stop thinking about it. Since sex is a physical act, she hypothesized that while Link possesses the ability to keep quiet, he would not naturally be silent. » some truly stellar fan logic in this one

« “You don’t have to do that. You can be loud. I can kill anything that disturbs us.” »