Show newer

i’m not an expert or anything, i mean i’m only a B.A., but bi typically means likes fucking both

Show thread

hey author, if your bi character’s thoughts are only ever about how their male partners were unsatisfying and their female partner is so much better, you might not be writing a bi character

i’m also praying for this author’s soul because they simply cannot talk to a girl to save their life

Show thread

i think this author is not american but i’m praying for their soul

Show thread

tag your g.d. “gay for cops” fics, AO3

« something you don't recognise for now, but in time you will learn is the propellant produced by high-powered firearms » okay i hate to poke at technicalities here but guns don’t produce propellants they light them on fire

i’m an expert at sculpting flat things
*pounds Play-Doh against countertop*
it’s a stomach

Show thread

« the sculpted flatness of her stomach » is it just me or is that an oxymoron

you all are lucky i am stuck at home and can’t go out into the world to MEET GIRLS

« I would like to recommend a Linux text editor, but I haven't found any good ones. »

the for loop, but not the actual loop, just the for part 

for (
let
dayInMonth = 1 - (new Date (year, month - 1, 1).getDay() + 6) % 7,
dayInWeek = 1,
week = calendarBody.insertRow(),
seasonIndex = +Object.entries(Array.from(seasons.values())).filter(( [ _, $ ] ) => month > $.startMonth || dayInMonth >= $.startDay).pop()[0],
nextSeason = Array.from(seasons.values())[(seasonIndex + 1) % seasons.size]
; daysInThisMonth >= dayInMonth || dayInWeek % 7 != 1
;
dayInMonth++,
dayInWeek = (dayInWeek + 1) % 7,
week = dayInWeek == 1 ? calendarBody.insertRow() : week,
!(nextSeason.startMonth > month || nextSeason.startDay > dayInMonth) ? (
seasonIndex = (seasonIndex + 1) % seasons.size,
nextSeason = Array.from(seasons.values())[(seasonIndex + 1) % seasons.size]
) : void null )

Show thread

look at these fucks there’s no way they grew that pumpkin themselves

🥴

Show thread

there are two types of people: those who know the exact cadence at which this is said on a visceral, emotional level, and non-Catholics

Show thread

Bless us, O Lord, and these Thy gifts, which we are about to receive from Thy bounty, through Christ our Lord, because we are ignorant white settler fucks who don’t know how to grow our own food. Amen.

Show older
📟🐱 GlitchCat

A small, community‐oriented Mastodon‐compatible Fediverse (GlitchSoc) instance managed as a joint venture between the cat and KIBI families.