sherclod holmes @wallhackio@cat.family

that moment when you are two milliseconds slower than Lesbian Foot Slave

the fuck is this

i have Peaked

I am now top 600 at the world in something so this may be my peak as a human being

im fucking GAMING

when your bible reference game is so esoteric that not even @aescling understood the reference

love wins

me coming to report you for offensive content (the toot was completely innocuous)

@amy @monorail nvm get fucked

@amy @monorail holy shit

Gameplay

• Lived up to the hype, it actually is that good
• Had a very smooth difficulty curve, the game teaches the player brilliantly. its incredible how tractable and readable the final levels are
• Levels are really designed as puzzles, at least from the lens of Mark Brown's concept of "The Catch" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zsjC6fa_YBg&t=157s). In this case, the extremely readable and clear level design demonstrates a straightforward path through the level, and "the catch" is that the gold/ace medal demands a time that can't be achieved with that path
• Getting ace medals is more about finding one or two good shortcuts than technical execution, i wouldn't have minded if the game asked a little more out of me for ace medals
• the secret "red medals" are a very nice feature though and the few I've gotten were really tough, i like that a lot (see attached video)
• searching for hidden items in the later levels starting getting tedious once the levels became large and played with verticality
• other than the last point this is right up there with base game celeste for some of the most "perfect" level design i have ever seen. but i am psychopath and still wished it was harder

Narrative

• the game is a pastiche of early 2000's anime slop, beach episode and all
• VERY horny
• while the premise is compelling, the Bullshit Anime Dialogue takes away from the tension that the premise could have had (is this intentional? there is a surprising amount of talent in the writing room (one of the writers wrote We Know the Devil???????, the other writer is a writer director and storyboarder with credits on Fiona & Cake, Infinity Train, and Ok KO)
• despite the amount of lore the worldbuilding is completely nonsensical (is this intentional?)
• i did enjoy Red and White's flirty dialogue in the second half of the game, they have good chemistry
• the second half of the game is about the need for forgiveness, not because the offending party deserves it, but because forgiveness can be freeing for the forgiver
• i didn't hate the story but i didn't like it either. won't surprise if in the next few years we start getting "The Story of Neon White is GOOD actually" video essays

It's not perfect but I'm still happy with this run

okay was this not absolutely outrageous to find

this game is so fucking rude

I am normal and can be trusted with twenty six dollars and seventy one cents

lmao

?????

It seems that the secret to being the best videogame ever made is getting an 84/100 on Metacritic

what happened to my pip-boy

🖼