this is the revised version of (8), which i didn't read because i knew this was coming

hopefully the blowjob isn't terrible; that would be embarrassing

well the REST of their writing is still pretty rough i think

« His voice had risen several octaves » i think they mean decibels

interesting choice to have zelda choose to go out in a dress when we have canon clearly indicating she prefers pants

if you're going to have zelda dress up as a commoner why not have it be a boy commoner named sheik

this sequence of zelda sneaking around is nice but it would be nicer if she was dressed up like a sheikah boy

« Oh, if the court could see her now… such casual fraternization with the working class. Ha! »

oh no it turns out the working class is evil after all

« “Hundred and twenty rupees.” » cute but you know this is like a dollar right

in breath of the wild a bottle of fresh milk is 12 rupees so this bottle of alcohol is 10 milks in price

not gallons, to be clear. 10 single-serving bottles of milk

this is strong alcohol being served in tiny glasses so per serving it is definitely cheaper

« Link scooted forward in his seat, still snickering as he looked at her with curious amusement. “So [the Goron] was a boy? How can you tell?” » BECAUSE THEY’RE ALL BOYS, LINK

zelda is making fun of link for kissing a boy and i think this is homophobia??

« She felt exposed lying prone beneath him—vulnerable to his physical strength and the the strength of his desires. It elicited an unexpected arousal within her, to know she was in some small way at his mercy. But there was a freedom in that surrender—a freedom that promised pleasure and emancipation from pain; from responsibility and disappointment and frustration. She need only give herself to Link—to the whisper of his fingers and the demand of his tongue and the headiness of this moment, to receive her reward… » this doesn’t seem healthy

« A thought occurred to her, then. She had received, but she had not given; and was not a part of the experience driving your partner to their own pleasure, and getting to bear witness to such intimate exposure? » and @Satsuma calls *my* Zelda obnoxious

this chapter was almost entirely foreplay and honestly it was pretty skillful to be able to pull that off but you wouldn’t know from these constant failures of worldbuilding and characterization and poorly-thought-through tropes

for someone who just had sex zelda seems remarkably ignorant of how arousal works