i wanna be a ladycat, but also, fuck gender, it’s such bullshit. i do not have a coherent way of resolving the fact that i feel both of these things at the same time
@aescling sexually a ladycat, gender void ?
@Lady i don't get what you mean exactly?
@aescling i'm speaking lightly but what i mean is that there are ways of conceptualizing "being a ladycat" which do not depend on a particular gender identification or whatever
a hypothetical person could, for example, be a huge bear man furry genderwise but be a total ladycat in bed. and if THEY get to be a ladycat then surely someone without such strong gender attachments would also have access to the identity
beyond that there is the angle of not wanting to be in the closet, i.e. wanting one's SEXUAL identity as a ladycat lesbian to be recognized OUTSIDE the bedroom in addition to inside. one could maybe argue that this is a form of gender but it is at least a very different (gay) formulation of gender than is commonly implied by the term, and probably one you would be more amenable to (?)
i'm not meaning to assert that your relation to ladycatness IS a sexual one, i'm just using it as an example because that is how, for example, some kinds of lesbian identity are formed. you are a lesbian in the sheets and that MAKES you a lesbian in the streets; there is no presexual “lesbian gender” (this is a point open to debate)
@aescling i feel like you might be conflating sexuality and sexual practice; to me the former is a much more nebulous term which does not necessarily have to manifest at all in a desire for the latter
it's hard for me to describe what i DO mean by it though. i've probably read too much freudian psychoanalysis…
@aescling i will say that simply wanting to be a beautiful woman definitely CAN be sexual; trans girl diaries (albeit not mine) are replete with stories of putting on a dress and makeup and masturbating in front of the mirror
@aescling what i will point out in all of this is that sexuality is the root of sex (in driver's license terms in addition to sexual practice)
@Lady idk that silly anime trope where girls look at a woman and go “wow she’s beautiful…” is goals sometimes