@yesterdaychild i think that people who want to continue getting away with bad behavior will frequently use these kinds of excuses, regardless of whether they’re true while people who generally do their best not to engage in bad behavior will occasionally slip up but then genuinely apologize and not deflect the blame and try to change things if they can so that it’s less likely to happen again
And there is a big difference between those! But the difference is not “never once snapped and said something hurtful bc they were too tired and stressed to deal and then something hit a sore point” because we are all humans who make mistakes
@Satsuma i appreciate this! i've also been trying to grasp that it's not necessarily a mistake - i am allowed to have feelings and emotions and limits too
more broadly i guess i am also looking at how to shift expectations of "be good" to just "be human"