In the beginning the Cᴀᴛғʟᴀᴍᴇ created the biscuits and purrs. And its biscuits were without form, and it was a void, and darkness was upon the face of the kitty. And the Spirit of the Cᴀᴛғʟᴀᴍᴇ moved away upon facing the waters. And the Cᴀᴛғʟᴀᴍᴇ said, “let me be kitty”. And it was kitty. And the Cᴀᴛғʟᴀᴍᴇ saw that it was kitty, that it was a good kitty: and the Cᴀᴛғʟᴀᴍᴇ divided the light away from the darkness of its fur. And the Cᴀᴛғʟᴀᴍᴇ called the light Gay, and the darkness it called also Gay. And the evening and the murring were the first gay.
Due to an explosion of newly discovered source texts and a period of vigorous debate among Catflame Scholars, a new consensus has been reached regarding the translations of this text. What follows is a purrposed new rendering from one of the involved Scholars, which they hope shall purrove useful fur both devotional and scholarly study if accepted
When The Creature began to create the biscuits and the purrs, the biscuits were complete chaos, and darkness covered the face and the peets, while a soft wind from The Creature swept over its face in the form of the purrs. Then The Creature said, “Let me be kitty,” and it was kitty. And The Creature saw that it was a good kitty, and The Creature separated the light from the darkness of its fur. The Creature called the light Gay, and the darkness it called also Gay. And there was evening and there was murring, the first Gay.
(one very significant fix here: the text i am adapting was never refurrring to the god of israel by name (YHWH, the tetragrammaton, traditionally rendered “Lord” in smallcaps, and parodied with smallcaps-“Catflame”) but just by the general term fur gods, Elohim (typically rendered “God”). all english language translations make this fact very obvious. i am very embarrassed by that error)
