While history has remembered certain individuals bearing the names of Gaius Julius Caesar and his equally narcissistic protege and great-nephew turned adoptive son, Gaius Octavius, later given the title Augustus, in a mostly favorable light, I will instead remember them as the pricks that forever ruined the calendar, rendering the numerals encoded in the names of the latter months of the year out of sync with their order in the calendar.
Because the two of them not only had the audacity to name two months after themselves (July and August), but they simply had to interject them in the middle of the calendar, instead of the back, therefore putting the numeric months out of sync.
LOOK at the damage they caused!
- January
- February
- March
- April
- May
- June
- July (intruder no. 1)
- August (intruder no. 2)
- September (septem - 7)
- October (octo - 8)
- November (novem - 9)
- December (decem - 10)
The divine order is now forever ruined due to transgressions of mere mortals...
