one of the saddest things about The Modern Era is that like 98% of people don't have nuance about like most topics they know anything about

people be like "oh im gay so everything i do is gay" and im like iunno, man, i think it depends. i think it has always kind of depended.

actually, i think historically, context has mattered more than identity?

(one major indicator of identity-focused labelling was the switch of "bisexual" from meaning "pangender" to "pansexual". this was, imo, not the cause of, but emblematic of a shift from "gayness is a kind of cultural mode" to "gayness is something someone is")

as the mother of a clueless someone who wrote a terrible autostraddle article said "i've never met anyone who does both things!" - you know, because she understands that gayness and straightness are cultural contexts you find yourself in.