• “post” → “toot”
• “my fellow posters” → “toops”
• “discourse” → “meta”
• “emoji” (singular) → “emojo”
• “emoji” (plural) → “emojim”
• “i’ve made a fool of myself” → “hoisted”
• “on the local and federated timelines” → “in public”
• “i like this” → “i’m fond of this”
• “i do not like that” → “not fond of that”
• “same hat” → “me too thanks”
• “i am online” → “awoo”
• “irl” → “meatspace”
• “cyberspace” → “cybrespace”
• “cool” → “rad”
• “incendiary” → “spicy”
• “gaming” (not pejorative) → “gameing”
• “gamer” (not pejorative) → “gameinger”
• “sort of person” → “kind of guy”
• “horny” → “hornt”
• “hon”, “luv”, etc → “friend”
• “this post gives me feelings” → “a”
• “this is my new band name” → “this is my mech”
• “favourite my post” → “boop my toot”
• “playfully flirt with me online” → “ping my florps”
• “i am at peace with the world” → “all things eventually return to crab”
• “aheago” → “hnnng”
• “chickens” → “cluckers”