Question about names for trans people (Cis name changers feel free to pipe up too)
How do I put this?
How do you know if / when you have picked a name you like?
Is there like, a romance to it?
I know when I first realized I didn't like my legal name (and was also thinking of pen names) I felt somewhat drawn to the idea of Jade Jones. I think the idea of Jade is obvious given my handle. The Jones is a reference to Jones Gunnerkrigg Court. I do worry about having a name after a character that for all I know will stop being someone I love.
There's also the fact I don't want to go by my legal last name because I'm pretty sure when my boomer cousin finds out I'm trans (I don't know why he's in charge) I'm out of the family 
But anyway, I don't think I'm into that name anymore. Well, maybe Jones still though I more feel like keeping my last name out of spite currently.
There's a name I really like that just occurred to me one day and I can't stop thinking about it. I worry about some familial logistics though.
I'm not gonna try legally changing my name for a while, but I want to know how you know you've found the one?
re: Question about names for trans people (Cis name changers feel free to pipe up too)
@lapis when the people you love and the people you work with both concur on calling you a name that you chose, that’s when it feels real
the origin doesn’t really matter much. you’ll give it your own meaning just by living. i would say it is best not to pick something TOO loaded with meaning, because you want it to represent YOU, not just your interests. (if you don’t think there is much to you aside from your interests, you will learn otherwise eventually 😜.)
last names can be even more arbitrary than first names. you don’t have to join a preexisting family (be it the Joneses or whoever) if you don’t want to. feel free to just snatch a nickname, handle, or epithet and make it your own.
you do have to MAKE it your own though. it's not a passive magic. so the real test is finding a name you are willing to keep redefining as yourself for the rest of your life.
